Oh, I am SO fed up with my hair! It is softer than it has ever been before…but it feels GREASY. Is this what my hair is supposed to feel like when it’s not coated with chemicals? I have no idea. What does that say about the American beauty industry when I don’t know what “normal” hair should feel like?
In any case, soft hair = frizzy hair for me, so I tried my hand at making some homemade gel. Here’s what I did:
1. Bring 1 cup of water to a boil.
2. Add 2 T of flax seeds.
3. Boil for 10 minutes.
4. Pour into a strainer to separate the gel from the flaxseeds. I collected the gel in a liquid measuring cup.
5. Whisk 1 part aloe vera gel with 3 parts flaxseed gel.
This is when things started to fall apart…
6. Use a funnel to try to get the gel into a squeeze bottle.
7. Realize that the gel was so dense that you couldn’t get it into the squeeze bottle.
8. Try shoving the gel through the funnel and into the bottle with a martini stirrer.
9. Get the martini stirrer stuck in the funnel.
10. Pop the bubble that was preventing the gel from flowing into the bottle.
11. Have the gel suddenly start overflowing from the bottle (but VERY SLOWLY).
12. PANIC.
13. While still holding the funnel (with the trapped martini stirrer) in place over the bottle, grab the closest thing (a beater from my hand mixer) and use it to try to direct the gel coming out of the funnel into another squeeze bottle (sitting empty, at the ready).
14. Somewhat successfully get the rest of the gel into the second bottle.
15. Wash a pot, spoon, whisk, measuring cup, funnel, martini stirrer, and beater that are COMPLETELY COATED IN GEL. Imagine that. Gel. All over. Allow at least 20 minutes and 900 bajillion gallons of hot water mixed with dish soap.
Yield: 4 T of gel that contain no preservatives, so must remain refrigerated and will last less than a week.
OK. So, the gel actually works pretty well – I need to use a lot of it, but it does give me soft, orderly curls. BUT, I don’t think I will be making it on a weekly basis. I read that you can freeze the gel…so I’m thinking I might make this recipe times 4 or 5 to make enough for the month. I could do this once a month. It’s a total pain in the butt, but I could do it.
It was as I was viciously scrubbing the gel pot that I felt the need to remind myself why I’m going through all of this. A very vocal part of my brain is saying, “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Just about every woman you know uses the hair products you’re trying to avoid. No one’s losing their hair. No one’s really sick.”
But then I have to stop and think – is that true? My friends and family are, generally speaking, NOT healthy. My roommate has recently been accosted by monthly yeast infections caused by her birth control (which her doctor calls a “normal” side effect). My five closest friends are, respectively, lactose intolerant, anemic, gluten intolerant, suffering from an influx of Candida (forcing her to drastically change her diet or deal with the risks associated with lacerated intestines), and a severe asthmatic going through immunotherapy to help her cope with her allergies. My dad is a diabetic, asthmatic, heart patient with severe allergies. My brother (and nephew) have Barrett’s esophagus, which is like heart burn that eats away at your esophagus (and can cause esophageal cancer). I have polycystic ovary syndrome and have been afflicted with some severe respiratory thing at least once a month for the past year. And this isn’t even looking at all of the people I know who are taking anti-depressants.
Do YOU know anyone who is perfectly healthy?
It’s not as though all of these people have the SAME health problems, but when I see THAT many people with debilitating issues on a day-to-day basis, I am forced to think…what are we doing wrong? Have people always been so…broken? There are certainly environmental factors that contribute to all of these issues, but I think the American mindset has become, “Well, when something goes wrong, a doctor will fix it.” I think people used to take better care of themselves, have better lifestyles – that whole “my body is a temple” thing. The “sound science” principle seems to affect not only the rationale behind allowing potentially harmful materials (e.g., lead, parabens, BPA, PVC, etc.) into our products, but also how we treat our bodies. What better time for the precautionary principle (“Well, this could cause a problem, so let’s avoid it!”) than with regards to our own bodies? And really, from an ecological perspective, it’s not that far of a jump to see how we should then also be using the precautionary principle with regards to all environmental issues as well. What we put in our water, in our air…we PUT IN OURSELVES. So, if anyone has ever done any research that might suggest that the crap that goes into my hair gel might be harmful to myself or the environment, then JOHN FRIEDA CAN GO TO HELL. I will designate one of my second-hand pots my “gel pot,” and flaxseeds and I will bond. Shoot, I will make VATS of the crap and start giving it away to friends and family.
One small step for beauty, one giant, righteous step for our collective well-being.
P.S. Warning: I’m about to make a sexual reference that might make some people uncomfortable. Read at your own risk…
For those of you who might be interested, I found out that my gel recipe (minus the aloe vera) can also be used as a personal lubricant. Who knew? Lube is another ball of wax altogether. Did you know that the glycerine used in most lubes is actually a leading contributor to yeast infections? I also heard a rumor that neither lube nor sex toys are regulated by the FDA because they’re considered “novelty items.” So, they are not subject to the same level of scrutiny. I plan to investigate this a bit more…
KP - You had me laughing - I am imagining your kitchen, the plugged funnel, the mess, the frustration,and the panic. I think I have been there. But good for you that you accomplished it, that it works, and that you will make more of it so that you can keep your silky hair look. Yes it is astounding that we don't know what normal is.
ReplyDeleteYour description of your friends and family and their health issues are a case in point. We don't know what is causing these maladies, but one thing is for sure - there are alot of them. I do think our industrialized life is the cause of them - as compared to undeveloped nations where their health issues are cholera, malaria, infections etc. We trade one set of issues for another ... and the multiple cocktail effect - who knows if wrapping food in plastic wrap will cause cancer, but that coupled with the pesticides in the food, or the pathogens in the water, or the chips from the no stick pan - the sum total could mean disaster. Thanks for a great tale.
Hi KP,
ReplyDeleteAs usual your description of making your gel had me rolling! I have had the same voice ask why I am doing some of the things I try when it seems like everything everywhere I turn is damaging. Even buying a new set of pots and pans has gotten me so frustrated that I just have not done it. I have heard not to get aluminum or non stick coating, as well as many other "do not" things, yet I don't think anyone told the people who make pots and pans.
You have a great point on the toy's not getting FDA approval because of their classification.
Your point on all of the health issues people have is so true. I interviewed Sr. Jones last week and she said she has heavy metal poisoning. I asked her if she knew where she got it. She said the house she lived in for more than 20 years on a busy road with bus's and cars traveling all day and night was her guess. Again, everywhere we look!